Lions, and Tigers, and Stripes, oh my!!

The White Stripes have been around for awhile, and they've gained quite a level of notoriety among indie kids and popsters alike. Unfortunately, I don't really understand what all the fuss is about! The claim that most people use to back up the White Stripes' musical genius is that this twosome has always refused to add any bells and whistles to their straight-ahead garage songs. They've stayed true to Motor City by keeping production values separated from music.

In my opinion, instead of high production values and strong musicianship, they use gimmicks like the whole fake incestuous relationship between Jack and Meg, the repeated colors red, white, and black (used most notably by the Nazi party), and the inherent bizarre nature of most of their music to attract the rock 'n' roll crowd.

I'm no prude. Alice Cooper and Ozzy Osborne aren't nearly as scary as Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson in my book. It would be incredibly easy for me to ignore the White Stripes' odd idiosyncrasies if I found anything remotely akin to genius in their music. However, I only hear messy rock with obtuse and pretentious lyrics. In my opinion, this is a far cry from the best music of Detroit, the music that actually took its name from the city: Motown. Where the Supremes and Stevie Wonder were able to break down social barriers and create excellent pop music with meaningful lyrics and awesome musicianship, the Stripes stand in my mind as two kids in a garage making sounds that are transient and two-dimensional. When I here "Seven Nation Army", I hear a mess. A crudely patched "song" that really doesn't make me feel anything.

It's not that I haven't tried to understand the Stripes. I've listened to every album, and I've even found songs that are enjoyable, but nothing particularly exciting or unique. Nirvana already made heavy music, and the Sex Pistols made messy music, and honestly, both made music that's much better than the Stripes'. Still, I listened, trying to understand that genius that had so many reviewers in a tizzy. I even invested in The Raconteurs (a band I find much more to my liking than the Stripes), and this morning I listened to "Icky Thump". Nothing really appealing, nothing really fun, nothing really different.

Please spell out what I've missed!